Dear Fashion Police ...

Tuxedos before 6 p.m. a fashion faux pas -- even in a wedding

Dear Fashion Police: I am going to be the mother of the groom at my son's church wedding. It will take place in Florida in late August at 11 a.m. The bridesmaids' dresses will be emerald green and tea-length. The mother of the bride will wear a teal dress. The men in the wedding party, plus the father of the bride and groom, will wear tuxedos.

I have chosen a dusty lavender velvet dress with cap sleeves that is slit at the leg. I plan to wear a small -- but not gaudy -- rhinestone necklace and black ankle-strap shoes with a black purse. Since velvet has moved to daytime wear and the dress does not look too heavy, I hope you approve. Also, your input on the accessories would be appreciated. -- Style-conscious mom of groom

Dear Style: We'll get to your dress in a minute, but we have to discuss something else first. We hate to sound like the proverbial broken record, but obviously not all of you have been paying attention when we've discussed proper attire for weddings. So listen up.

Repeat after us: Tuxedos should not be worn before 6 p.m. Say it again. One more time. With the mountains of books, magazines and Web sites devoted to weddings, does anyone check to see what's appropriate? Because it ain't a tuxedo before noon.

We realize there are lots of wedding etiquette advisers who insist that whatever the bride and groom want to do is just ducky, since it's their wedding. Sorry. Having dear old Aunt Minnie read one of her poems at the service is OK. Making the wedding party wear tuxedos before most people have finished their first cup of coffee is not OK.

However, we realize that you're not going to rush over to your son and future daughter-in-law and breathlessly tell them that the Fashion Police says they are creating a serious fashion no-no (much as we love fantasizing about that scenario). This is for the rest of you contemplating your nuptial wardrobes.

And now let's get to you. Velvet wouldn't be our first choice for a late-summer-morning wedding, but if you insist the dress doesn't look like it was made from your living-room curtains, we'll believe you. However, the rest of the ensemble needs some tweaking.

Dump the rhinestone necklace and wear a small gold chain or pearls instead. Even a little bit of flash is too much at that hour. And nix the black shoes and bag (too evening looking) and go with something lighter. If you don't want to do the dyed-to-match thing, try cream or some shade of off-white that will complement the dress.

Now go and have a wonderful time, and throw some rice for us.

Send letters to Fashion Police, Los Angeles Times Syndicate, 145 S. Spring Street, Los Angeles, California, 90012. (Questions and observations of general interest will be addressed in the column.)

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