Singles seek soul mates in cyberspace

Usage is reported up since September 11

Love connections: Match.com says its service has led to more than 1,400 marriages.

From Rusty Dornin
CNN

SAN FRANCISCO, California (CNN) -- If you don't want to go dateless on Valentine's Day, think about socializing in cyberspace. You won't be alone.

The Web site Match.com reports that in the two months following the September 11 attacks, its membership went up 70 percent.

And sociologists say that's not surprising in times of uncertainty.

"Even if it doesn't happen to you, it reminds you that you don't even want to watch the news without that special someone on the side of you," sociologist Pepper Schwartz, a professor of sociology at the University of Washington in Seattle. "So I believe the services have been used more."

QUICKVOTE What kind of luck have you had with Internet dating services? Found my mainframe. Still looking but I like it. Useless, sometimes even a rip-off. Haven't tried it. View Results

These days, online dating services cater to just about every heart's desire. If you're seeking someone over 50, there's Senior Friend Finder. For Jewish singles, try Jdate.com.

And for the rest? Consider Matchmaker, Kiss.com or Match.com, which claims its service has led to more than 1,400 marriages and hundreds of thousands of relationships.

Sites allow users to define their ideal mates with any number of variables, including age, location, height, gender, education, smoking tendencies, ethnicity, even income.

Trial and error

Doug Wyllie began scrolling for "the one" in September, and it soon became obvious to him that more men than women were hitting their keyboards for a date.

"I don't make a lot of money and I don't have any power per se, so it makes it very tricky," he said. "But it's fun to meet new people."

Some women find looking for Mr. Right on the Internet just a little scary.

Faith Sedline says that even though the greatest danger in online dating was getting carpal tunnel syndrome, she still gets butterflies now and then.

"You don't know who's going to walk up and you're thinking, 'Oh, what did I just do? Why am I doing this?' But that fades pretty quickly."

Kiss.com notes that a user's real identity and contact information are never disclosed to anyone else unless the user decides to do so.

Although many sites charge a fee to use their services, they say it's still a bargain. Jdate, which charges $28.50 for a month or $68.50 for three months, argues that users can contact 1,000 "potential soul mates" for less than the price of a movie ticket and a tub of popcorn

Some worry about the stigma of using the computer to find a companion.

"When I cop to online dating, their first reaction is, 'Oh, you can't get a date!'

"But you know, I just thought it would be fun," Sedlin said. "You get to meet a lot of people."